“Go Rest, Young Man.”

I have not posted in July or August because I’ve been moving. And being challenged by moving during the heat wave we’ve been in, has been like boot camp, or the 40 years of wandering in the desert. In addition, I’ve not posted in September, because I was “doing a ministry,” which I felt called to do – helping someone through cancer treatments.

The physical move to another location has been physically exhausting but yet very spiritually significant to me – subjectively, or rather for myself mostly. This has been a true experience, although not because it was filled with miracles, and angels, and wondrous spiritual revelations. No, it has been spiritually significant, because it was a time of working to let go of the darker energy which was manifesting in the Earth, or specifically that darker energy/consciousness in my line of sight so many different ways all around me during the circumstances of the moving.

The Light was also manifesting, and to witness it, required a willingness to exercise patience, much letting go of my own judgements and criticisms, with a willingness to offer compassion and understanding. I had to practice the teachings of Christ, and many times wipe the dust off my sandals and move on from the heat, dehydration, exhaustion and struggle with people. (And no, practicing is not mastering.) I did the best I could with what I had.

On a sidenote: the Light does not FIGHT against darkness. The Light exists, is present, is manifested… and this presence, which we either actively work to bring in, or NOT, inhibits darkness in the same way turning on a light switch in a room, inhibits the room being dark.

What a truly magnificent opportunity to be challenged to see the flowing and manifesting of how dark energy can manifest through human and non-human ways yet not be wrapped up in it. Where I might otherwise have worked to avoid any manifestations of darker energy in the circumstances all around me, I also used it as a classroom for my own practicing, practicing, practicing of letting go of the past, letting go of the spending of darker energy, and letting go of any negative or harmful thoughts and energy which I could have latched onto, but worked to not latch onto. I knew I was being given an opportunity to walk a razor’s edge, and so I worked at – doing the best I could with what I had.

I feel very blessed, honored, having been given a gift, and whatever other words might fit. Did I complain and gripe and call out for what I needed? Sure, but I also worked to recognize that my journey was to keep moving. So, I did the best I could with what I had.

I did the best I could at not blaming another person, and sometimes had to come back around to work again at letting go of not blaming any other person. I worked at kindness. I worked at patience. I worked at persistence. I worked at creativity. I worked at trust and I worked at faith. I worked at humility. I worked at not giving up. Did I master any of these? No. But, I worked at trying to keep working at it, doing the best I could with the understanding, beliefs, and awareness which I had.

Like everyone else, I have more work to do in all of those qualities (fruits of the Spirit).

Each day I felt like my task was to hook up the oxen and plow the field. Being a Taurus, I was both oxen and plowman. Therefore, I knew the soil had to get plowed, and only I would plow my own.

***

I don’t know how to convey the fullness of the darker energy of the experience, but I felt, I was one person of billions going through this darkness in the Earth with this being how it manifested in my life. And on top of that add in moving during a heat wave in July and August, this was a whirlwind experience. My levels of exhaustion were amazing to me, as was the presence of the Light which I would work at, to return my attention to.

Now, while this may all seem silly or a bit crazy (the heat does affect the brain), I practiced Christ’s words of “taking this journey ONLY one day at a time – accomplishing what I could “today” on today, and leaving tomorrow to take care of itself. I caught myself many times – when I would physically walk somewhere, I would have my eyes on the ground in front of me, eyeing the land where my shoes would land next. I did this mostly in moments when I was exhausted.

Now, do not think I am celebrating the darker energy. I knew it was manifesting. I saw it’s pain and harm which it was manifesting. I saw and still see turmoil and suffering, both physical, mental, emotional, financial and spiritual. What I am celebrating was/is to take my journey in my life – real world circumstances – and it be the opportunity to practice the walk what I call a straight path – regardless of how successful I was at walking a clean path. I always believed that God’s presence was beckoning me to keep going, to help others if I could, and to let go of any judgement of the circumstances or the people associated with my moving. The work was the holding on to the feeling and thoughts that God was/had been with me every day, and every moment of that day. With that, I could keep going. Also with that, when it came time to go to sleep at the end of the day, I could lay down and rest.

*****

The Ministry

For myself only, I consider this the ministry. I have had a friend for about 8 years, give or take many months. This person had asked for my help in going to see the Doctors for potential cancer. This request for help, I said, “Yes” to. So, in August and September, I also have had the opportunity to help the person deal with this medical/life/death circumstance. This ministry was daily, and the disease was not going away on its own. It threatened the person’s life and with the help of other people and myself, the person was able to come out on the other end with treatments having a successful potential outcome. Again, I worked at facing helping my friend’s journey one day at a time – do in one day only that which one could do that day. Do not worry about tomorrow. Let tomorrow take care of itself. Again – Christ’s teaching.

And with my ministry finished, I find the entire summer has finished.

***

“God Bless Us, Everyone” Charles Dickens

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.